Breastfeeding and Shame

Breastfeeding as another arena for perfectionism, judgement and shame within Motherhood.

  • Posted On: 4 August 2021
Breastfeeding and Shame

I think that breastfeeding can be another arena for perfectionism, judgement and shame within Motherhood


I think that there is a lot of pressure on women to breastfeed in order to be a ‘good mum’. 


I think that there is pressure to put your own needs to the bottom of the pile and to do whatever it takes for your children. And don’t get me wrong as mothers we want the best for our children- and we matter too.


So many women feel guilt and shame for not breastfeeding. For the wellbeing of new mothers across the world-this needs to stop.


It’s not a choice for everyone too. So many women would love to breastfeed but can’t. They lacked the support, they were away from their babies, they had to return to work sooner than they had hoped and the list goes on. And it can often cause them so much pain. It’s something that women share often in my maternal trauma sharing circles. 


For anyone that is reading this and can relate to finding their breastfeeding journey traumatic- I am sending you so much love. It’s ok to grieve the experience that you wanted. I hope that you get the support that you deserve to process your experience and feelings around this. It’s important to do this. Its ok to do this. If I can help- please contact me.


There is also shame placed on women for feeding in public, for feeding thier child past a certain age, for feeding two of their children, and it needs to stop. 


We need to stop shaming women. We need to support women and encourage them to make decisions that are right for them. 


What is right for the mother is right for the baby-100%.


Your mental, physical and emotion wellbeing is so important. You matter. And to be able to consistently show up for your child-you need to show up for yourself. It’s not selfish, it’s not wrong- it’s the best thing that you can do for your child.


So, ladies, lets lift one another up. Let’s celebrate one another and lets encourage one another to make choices throughout our motherhood journey that allow us to be the happiest, fullest and most empowered women and mother that we can be.


So much love


Kel x

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